Some time last summer Joe and I went to New Orleans and although he’ll be insanely embarrassed that I’m telling this story – we went to “The Tea Room” and had a psychic reading. (Joe is going to kill me when he reads this!). I’m not going to recap all of the juicy details of what lies in our future, but I will tell you that our psychic told me that I should start writing again. I said, “of course, yes, I’ll do that”. Obviously, I’ve really been procrastinating about what to write on here. I can tell you that I write blogs in my head all the time – but I have not had the willpower to share online in quite a while. 2010 was just a really difficult year that seemed to suck the life out of me for a while. I’d like to say that, “I’m back, ” but in all honesty – the real story is that “I’m changed”.
There is a poem/prayer that I have known for a long, but just now learned to appreciate. The Serenity Prayer.
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
Sometimes, what we fear worst – actually happens. Sometimes we lose our jobs, our businesses, the person we love – and there is nothing we can do to change it. Courage is knowing that no matter what – you’ll pick yourself up, not lose hope, keep looking forward and to never let whatever you lost – take any part of you with it.
Recently, Joe and I went to Palermo, Sicily for a long weekend. It was a last minute addition on the end of a business trip to London for me. I am a first generation American – my father came to the United States in 1969 and other than myself, my father and brother – our whole family still resides in Palermo. While visiting with my Uncles, Aunt and cousins – I felt completely at ease, almost at home on the Mediterranean island. I had been there a few times as a very young child, but with a lapse of 23 year since I last saw my family – it was quite a shock to see how comfortable the entire experience could be. My family took Joe and I on a whirlwind walking tour of all of the historical parts of the city and countryside. What a plethora of history to absorb in such a short time! As I visited each area – I realized that my father had walked those very steps, in the same areas – so long ago. What a connection to have with a parent that had given up so much in hope of providing something more – something new and something better.
I think my father doesn’t realize how much he got right. Our life was less than perfect (but who’s is?); however – if my Dad set foot upon this land with hopes of creating a family and opportunities for his children…. he did. He may not have liked some of the years in between then and now – but a few years ago – things started to really come together for our family. My dad just put the home I was born to, grew up in and eventually my mother died in – for sale. When that home is finally a new start for a different family, my dad is packing up and moving to Florida to spend the rest of his days with us. Yes, there will be moments when I want to kill him – but for the most part I am looking forward to watching him relax a little, enjoy the grandkids, play with the dogs and smile. He deserves that, and so do I.
I’m going to try my best to start writing more often (this may be the third or fourth promise of this since my posts first started dwindling) … but I’m not giving up! I have done a much better job so far this year of balancing work and family. I even took the time to play at the arcade with the kids today – and I had fun – I wasn’t stressed about what emails I missed! We have done a much better job of dragging our friends out with us – and we’re going to keep on pushing you guys! Whether it is family dinners again, crab island once a month or just having a few drinks at our new favorite hangout – Cuvee Bistro – it doesn’t matter. We just need to be there for each other more often – to laugh away the hard stuff, celebrate the good stuff and plan the next adventure.